Wednesday 2019-05-22




By Dumisa Dlamini | 2019-03-16

No woman worthy her salt should be asking for anything from a man she is dating or even married to.

By their nature women ain’t beggars, never were and by all chances shouldn’t be. Instead they will use a man’s generosity and stinginess towards their persons as a gauge to see how much they mean to that particular guy and then act, respond accordingly and appropriately kuloyo mzuzu.

On the other hand, it should give every man sublime pleasure to make providence of resources to the woman he loves as per the measure and depth of his pockets. Societal Scales will tell you  this much, a man who does not give his woman money ain’t  stingy as such, he is suffering from a syndrome called a habit of choice, ukhona lomunye lamtsandza mbamba alamupha lemali and overlooks you hence you have to dig for money from him. That said, it is disturbing to note how petty, flimsy and silly women have become in begging from men nalangazange amgane. It bothers Scales if men ain’t tired of these stupid requests that flood their cell phones every day from a world of women who are convinced all their expenses are best placed in a man’s pocket simply because he has registered some romantic interests on her.

Come to think of how silly it is that every time a woman takes a trip kuya nje lakaMhlushwa in South Africa, she will text you atsi ucela umphako. What you consider to be a joke becomes serious asahwaya sivalo sakho afuna “lomphako”. It should worry every man why he should pay for a trip where he has not commissioned anyone to undertake and more so where none of his interests will be represented where the woman is going to. Imagine if you were to prepare her dumplings and a marathon chicken for her request, she would instantly go sour because the requests is actually about money. An imbalance is recognised in the fact that utakucele imali ngisho ahamba nalelenye iboyfriend.

Women can be funny and downright naïve in the manner they request these things. If a man is acquainted with your impending trip, he should find it in heart, corresponded with his pocket that akuphe imali. There is no need to be abused through your cell phones with a million messages afuna umphako as if same is a flight ticket to where you are going. Once your girlfriend starts asking for imali yemphako you should understand that you are not the only man who is being asked for same. Every other man, lomsomako, lowakewamsoma, nalamganile are “victimised” njengawe. When you pay, they also pay and in the end she enjoys a holiday, a trip with another boyfriend.

You wouldn’t have heard the worst and the last of woman’s flimsy requests until she tells you about her birthday a hundred months alway.  She will keep reminding you about the day yet awusiye uyise and you ain’t her mother as well, two people who may have vested interest on the day she was born.

Come the day, she demands cake, a giant one for that matter, a present which she shall clearly spell out and specify and a dinner. Put together she wants money from you. This person has no legitimate hold over you save for the fact that ukugane only twenty-four hours ago or more maybe!

A young man Mgamuli Matsenjwa had been forced to book and reserve an entire restaurant for the night because it was Lomasoso’s birthday, an event he had been forcefully pushed toconsider, plan and pay for. Lo and Behold! He found himself spending the night alone in an empty rendezvous because girly had got a better offer from a guru who was taking her to Sandton, Johannesburg for her birthday. The latter bore the costs anyway and the woman later flimsily apologised. You are never the only man who is harassed with a string of birthday requests, remember.

Men have been abused monetarily for stupid things like lugalolwakhe lolwephukile which she wants to replace and the man is supposed to pay for that. As she calls she will be asking you if she can go ahead and make bookings at the saloon for she has this special lady who specially does her nails. Live lihlupheke kangaka ngemali, some lazy, bored and troublesome girls are worried about broken nails not even a broken finger for God’s sake.


It doesn’t matter what time of the month it is the women you like, love or dating will ever be asking money from you- yelite, yekudlala nekumosa likhukhu lakho nje. Broken nails awuve nje. In all essence, a woman who is concerned about nails angaba ngumfati wabani, wekwentani nje!

That is not the end of the list, they will be asking money for a hair do, this and that. Ukucela lemali like her life is entirely depended on that. In the event you refuse or ulandvule, you will never have access to her of any sort. There could be  one calling in the middle of the day telling you she is in the vicinity, ulambile. You are expected to leave your work, get to her, and deliver money so she buys lunch.

She won’t be alone when you get here but with an army of hungry friends who also have their mouths wide open because batekelwe kutsi iyeta inkunkumela nemali, if this doesn’t make a man a fool, nothing ever will.

 A politician with a young and beautiful university girlfriend once got a call from her. She was demanding lunch which had become a habitual behaviour from her to lomuntfu lomdzala. This time he was not going to be harassed. He asked her where she was to which she responded that she was in campus and further added her friends were with her and hungry as well. The guru seemed to have no problem with the numbers for he promised he was sending a driver to fetch them.

Hours later she called to report that they weren’t seeing anyone in the form and shape of his driver at campus. He profusely “apologised.“Ngulesiyingayinga sadriver wami; I told him to go to Kwaluseni Campus nyalo ushaya utsi useLuyengo akakuboni” By so saying, he had escaped the trap and never performed the miracle of “Feeding Five Thousand.”

You see whether a woman is here with you, at her own place or travelling the man has to pay for this or that. She may even lie and say uyavilapha kupheka, buy her food and send it to her house. Asewuve nje how much stupidity men have been reduced to.

Delivering same she will meet you at the door, pick the food and bid you goodbye for another man is bringing something else for the same woman, in the same house. You will never win with women!

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